so i genuinely did not realize this until yesterday morning, but it’s my 2 year anniversary of joining this site. huh

it’s a story i’ve told dozens of times here, but i’ll say it anyway. when i first joined this site, i was a young scared teen just looking for a place to share their art, after my previous favorite art-sharing site (buzzly) went down in flames. i had first heard of this site the year previously, through my fnf phase

before then, i thought newgrounds was just a place for angsty, crude and hateful people who would never accept me or my work. i was dead fucking wrong. 

i have this site’s art forum to thank for a good amount of the improvement i’ve made these past 2 years (especially since i was only just learning how to draw humans when i first joined). i’ve met so many nice people here who have only supported me these past 2 years

i’ve changed a lot as a person since i first joined, as expected since it’s been 2 years lol. i’ve been through a shit ton since then. i’ve matured a lot since then. i’ve gone from a little newgrounds baby to an emo, sad teen drawing funky humanoids LMFAO. i’ve discovered more of my identity and who i am as a person. this site has been with me through all of those moments and i don’t know if i can properly express how grateful i am for that

anyway, thanking specific people like last time:

@mawibblap - hello hi hello hi wilson!!!!!!!!!! i remember seeing you on the forums here back when i first joined, and thinking u were really nice, but that i would never get the chance to talk to you. look at us now lmfao! u are such a nice and funny person <3 thank u for making the past year for me a little brighter

@DenThatDude - i don’t talk to you as much as i should and it makes me sad. you’re such a cool person and i hope u know how happy it makes me whenever u leave reviews on my stuff!!!! thank u man

@MARXVEEMOAM - we usually talk on a different site but u get a spot here anyway bc you’re cool

all of my mutuals who i don’t commonly talk to (@ElsieMeraki, @picolocity366, @Eldritchsaxes, @Oddlem, @Kerzid) i promise i am supporting you guys wholeheartedly from over here!!!!!! i hope we can get to talking more someday o/

the art forum (especially the regulars) - thank you for providing criticism & advice whenever needed! you made me a better artist, taught me the basics i never learned, and even helped me mature as a person in some aspects

@ErasedMe and @Slidebrain - already thanked u guys back in my 1 year anniversary post but im mentioning u two again. back in 2022 u guys put me on an underrated artists list, and i hope u know that made younger me so so so happy <3 esp since i felt very behind compared to my peers, as i had only just started learning how to draw humans

all 113 of my followers and any more who might show up in the future - thank you for enjoying my art! i can’t properly put into words how much it means to me <3

i hate being sappy but i think today it’s deserved. anyway murder drones ep 7 and the next spooky month episode are coming up soon and i need to mentally prepare

just making this post quickly before i forget. i finally managed to snag a slot for an account on sheezy yesterday! it’s here: https://sheezy.art/wonkypaws

if u remember, it used to be pretty popular iirc before it closed down in about 2022 i think? either way it’s back now, and it’s still in private beta but slots have been opening in very small batches every few hours. it’s very worth it tho

before anyone asks: i will still be uploading here! i am not leaving newgrounds!!! i’ll just be posting both here & on sheezy from now on

on an unrelated note……………. art soon 👁

i don’t know if anyone reads these types of posts but i write them anyway because it’s cool to be honest with people

2024 is kind of sucking ass actually

hate to put something like this at the top of the page but 2024 hasn’t exactly been treating me well so far. in january a stray cat that we considered a part of the family was mauled by a dog in our front yard. it hit us really hard, and it killed my motivation to do anything for a bit. don’t worry tho, i’m doing better

mentioned this on my art thread but that’s also the reason why i ended up not doing anything for pixel day. it happened just a few days before pixel day and i really couldn’t bring myself to do my entry. i still want to get back into pixel art tho, so i might just make what i was planning anyway

possible hiatus

lately ive been considering taking an indefinite hiatus from newgrounds. ive recently realized that all of this art block and fear of making art has been caused by this site, in a way. like, ive realized that the reason why im scared is because im afraid ill make something “bad” and people will hate it and realize how bad of an artist i really am, and then they’ll leave…………. impostor syndrome sucks

though its difficult tearing myself away from this place bc it means a lot to me. it taught me so much about art and i def wouldn’t be in the place i am now if it weren’t for this site

i have gotten some art done (woah! wonkypaws finishing art in the year of 2024? unbelievable) but im refraining from posting it for this reason. im trying out keeping my art between me and my friends. it’s more comfortable, but i do miss this place

in general im just figuring myself & my art out and stuff. im doing okay though :)

anyway this post has been kind of sad. ill end it on a lighter note: did you know that cows have best friends?

hopping on the 2023 recap train bc im trying to become more active on here again. i missed this place

honestly, i don’t remember much of this year lmao. it just completely flew by (+ i have a dogshit memory). like, since when was tomorrow christmas eve? didn’t the year just start? i feel like i got thrown years into the future. i do NOT feel my age, i still feel 13

despite that, i can still remember that this year was kind of shit for me, especially the later end. ive been hanging on here by a thread guys :,) i have hopes it’ll get better tho

ive dug through my newsposts to try to recall the most important parts of this year for me, if you’re interested

discovering myself & growing

i’ve grown and changed so much as a person since the beginning of this year, and it’s evident looking back on my old posts. ive always heard that your teen years are your biggest development years both physically and mentally, and i think that tracks. i think it was this year that i discovered i was non-binary? i can’t rlly remember tbh. im so much happier now that i have a better grip on who i am and who i want to be

i also think i got a lot better with socializing and dealing with people in general. i used to get so nervous talking to people, i would get physically sick, even if the conversation was going well. i had a practically non-existent social battery. and while these are still issues i’m trying to deal with, they’ve gotten a lot better. i’ve met a lot of people who i love very very much and i couldn’t be more grateful for them. not all of them are on newgrounds, so i’ll thank everyone collectively. thank u everyone, love u all <3333333

1 year anniversary

i had my one year anniversary on this site way back in march!!!! im still so grateful that i joined this site. i definitely wouldn’t be the person and artist i am now if it wasn’t for newgrounds

creative ruts

i struggled a lot creatively this year. like, a lot. i barely got anything done, and that sucks. i miss when i was a kid and i would finish multiple pieces in a day just bc i wanted to have fun, and i wasn’t worrying about anatomy or proportions or what my followers would think

all year i’ve been trying to pinpoint an exact reason as to what caused this. ive landed on these:

• youtube. i keep getting distracted by youtube shorts and scrolling to see if any creators i like uploaded a new video, or trying to find the “perfect” music to draw to, and it’s impeding my ability to draw. i just need to throw a playlist/podcast on and move on
• perfectionism. this is the biggest factor, i think. i keep telling myself my next finished drawing has to be the biggest or best one i’ve done, or i need to draw something specific bc it’s popular, or i want to draw a character i like and my brain goes “your followers won’t like that”, or i draw the face wrong and im like “shit shit everyone will know you’re secretly a terrible artist. the jig is up”. one of my art goals this year is to let go of perfectionism, and just draw for the sake of drawing, like i did when i was a kid. i don’t need to focus on making “good” art, i just need to focus on improving and having fun. this is the biggest thing i want to work on next year
• ideas. i am a chronic overthinker and whenever i want to draw, i keep trying to find the “perfect” idea, even though that doesn’t exist. “your followers won’t like that/won’t know what that is/you’re not good enough yet” stfu we’re having fun over here. i need to just pick a concept to work with and move on

at least i know what’s causing it now; the next step is finding a solution and doing it. art is my escape and it has been for years, i want to keep it that way

i already included this in my last news post, but here’s my art summary for 2023:

getting frontpaged for the first time

in may of this year, my nikku art got frontpaged, and i didn’t even realize it until several days later lmfao. and this was when i had the habit of looking at the art page every morning……………. i may be blind

i was so unbelievably happy tho. it was insane seeing myself next to genuinely skilled artists. i still don’t feel worthy lmfao. i’m so grateful tho

hitting 100 followers

on madness day, i officially hit 100 followers on here! that is still fucking insane, i can’t imagine that many people enjoying my self-indulgent brain mush. seriously, thank you to everyone who’s stuck around this long <3

i can’t think of much else, honestly. i did get into a lot of new things that have consumed my soul ever since (cough cough MURDER DRONES cough cough MCYT cough cough) but other than that, i don’t think much else very important happened to me this year

i hope to be much more active on here next year, and to get much more done (because one finished drawing a month has been Kinda Sad). i also want to make some oc stuff next year; i’ve already got a project in mind 👀 love u all <3

already posted this on toyhouse, almost forgot to put it here too. i look forward to these every year so ive been hyped

copy-pasting from my toyhouse bulletin:

i think out of all, i improved the most on anatomy this year. u can’t rlly see it bc it’s been forever since ive last finished a drawing of an actual human LMFAO but im working on that i swear. one of my biggest goals this year was to get comfortable drawing the human body and making it believable, and i think i def achieved that. i definitely have a lot to work on but ive come a long way and im still proud of myself

i think my biggest goal for next year is to stop being such a perfectionist and actually finish shit. i am a chronic overthinker and as a result, i barely ever actually finish anything. im either doodling/studying in my sketchbook or trying and failing to make a finished piece nowadays. most of the reason why I never finish stuff tends to be bc i doubt myself. it takes a lot longer for me to finish drawings nowadays. i used to pump finished drawings out in like, less than an hour, while now it takes me over 4+ hours, not including breaks. and then i see a minor anatomy mistake and my brain is like “everybody will know. everyone will finally realize how much of a shitty artist you are. the jig is up” and then i panic and give up

i need to put an end to that bc it’s been going on for months and im sick of it lmfao. it’s a lot harder to break than it sounds but im going to try my best. get ready to see some shitty art bc oh BOY i am not going to hold back

here are my older art summaries for comparison (the oldest ones i can find):

rare sighting of a wonkypaws newgrounds post

so it’s been 2 months lmfao

i promise i am alive, just stressed and not as creative as i used to be. im working on it tho! i am doing okay!

i just haven’t been very active on this site either. ive been a lot more active on the toyhouse forums (go check me out btw, im mostly active on the forum side of the site tho). i want to get back into using this site someday, but im not sure when. ill come back when im ready tho <3

anyway merry christmas

anyway, as an apology for 2 months of dead silence. i recently redrew a christmas ornament i made when i was like, 7 or 8. my family still hangs up the old one every year and it’s been annoying me for years, so i finally got around to doing something about it lmfao

the new ornament:

and the old one:

what the fuck happened to its snout. this thing needs to see a vet

i want to get more into trad art tho, it’s fun and i rlly like using fineliners. this was a good start i think

anyway im retreating back to my corner. i will see u in 50 years (or 5 seconds, depends on when i return)

the anniversary of when my stupid little baby brain went “fuck this” and escaped my mom’s womb to live on a space rock. Fun

using this as an opportunity to give some little updates. i took a short break from art for about a week bc i was burnt out (and just more focused on writing), and im glad i did. i wasn’t very active on newgrounds at all for a bit because of that, but i’m slowly getting back in the groove. that’s honestly about it LMAO i haven’t done much

i know ive been kind of inactive for the past few months but i’m Working On It I Swear

what the FUCK that is a lot of people

thank you so much to everyone <3 i don’t even know what to say without it sounding cheesy and repetitive lmao. it’s just insane to imagine one hundred fucking people enjoying my self-indulgent brain mush. seriously, thank you all <3333333

madness day is in 2 days!!!!!! hell yeah!!!!!!! i tried to participate last year but waited too long and ended up not being able to come up with anything before the due date lmao. i learned my lesson from last time, and this year ive got something to celebrate 👀

special sneak peek:

the character will be a surprise, but if you know me you’ll probably know who it is LMAO he’s my favorite madness character and I’ll take every chance i get to do a drawing of him

since my last news post was a major announcement that’s slightly outdated now (my device is still going super funky, randomly turning off and overheating & shit, but i’ll update if it gets worse), i wanted to finally get that off the front of my profile lmao

here’s a bunch of doodles ive done in the past few weeks. ive posted all of these already on my art thread, so if you want to see more doodles like this…… 👀

ive been trying to branch out of my comfort zone (as evidenced by the environments and the fact that i actually drew a man for once lmao) and it’s been really fun!! it’s nice getting to draw a variety of things and not just the same pretty women. not that i don’t like pretty women, but still